Born To Die- Lana Del Rey

It has been so long since i last wrote in this little space of  mine... oh how much i've miss this.. writing watever i have in my mind so freely.. i have so much to share.. so many things have happened for the past few months.. both good stuff and bad.... making me wonder.. why the extremes?? anyway... i'm not gonna dwell on things i have no answers to... as usual to live up to my way of life.. i shall just live as the moment takes place... nothing more nothing less.. just enjoy the pace of life as it sets to be.. "Live for the Moment" as some would say (:

Good news is that i'm happy to be able to spend my days here in Japan with a special someone.. a good fren that has always been the most trustworthy person i've known since my first day in Japan. He has always been someone that I have a good laugh with, someone i can open up my inner most feelings to, and never having to hide my fear nor act tough (which i hate most of all)... who doesn't mind my silliness despite being 29 and never judge me for my actions and words said. Thank you. 

Photo taken on my 29th Birthday summer this year

Bad news is that.... i had twice the episode of blackouts and that didn't turn out as small and petty as i wanted it to be.. this year just end of november, i encountered another one and this time, shit just got serious and i went through the whole MRI scan, blood test, and watsoever not that you just saw on tv and never imagined it upon yourself. The whole ordeal is not over yet but i am hoping for the best. For all its worth, i am feeling a lil downer lately but positive. I know i sometimes crack jokes over it to keep things at bay and myself in sanity. LOL. 

Me smiling for the camera post MRI scan

Honestly, i find this quite humorous.. no? u don't think so.. i mean.. the farnie part of all.. what are the odds this happened to me? it's like striking the lottery.. just that the first prize is not as fun as a million dollars.. ROFL... anyway.. more bout that later when i got more news on the test results.. right now.. nothing much more can be said or done..

Why this post all of a sudden?! 

• Cos it's the end of the year in another day's time...
• Cos i absolutely eff-ing love Lana Del Rey...
• Cos she came out with this new song that I couldn't help but feel attached to... at least for now.. 

Feet don't fail me now
Take me to the finish line
All my heart, it breaks every step that I take
But I'm hoping that the gates,
They'll tell me that you're mine
Walking through the city streets
Is it by mistake or design?
I feel so alone on a Friday night
Can you make it feel like home, if I tell you you're mine
It's like I told you honey

Don't make me sad, don't make me cry
Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough
I don't know why
Keep making me laugh,
Let's go get high
The road is long, we carry on
Try to have fun in the meantime

Come and take a walk on the wild side
Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain
You like your girls insane
Choose your last words
This is the last time
Cause you and I, we were born to die

Lost but now I am found
I can see but once I was blind
I was so confused as a little child
Tried to take what I could get
Scared that I couldn't find
All the answers, honey

Don't make me sad, don't make me cry
Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough
I don't know why
Keep making me laugh,
Let's go get high
The road is long, we carry on
Try to have fun in the meantime

Come and take a walk on the wild side
Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain
You like your girls insane
Choose your last words,
This is the last time
Cause you and I
We were born to die
We were born to die
We were born to die

Come and take a walk on the wild side
Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain
You like your girls insane

Don't make me sad, don't make me cry
Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough
I don't know why
Keep making me laugh,
Let's go get high
The road is long, we carry on
Try to have fun in the meantime

Come and take a walk on the wild side
Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain
You like your girls insane
Choose your last words
This is the last time
Cause You and I
We were born to die
We were born to die

"Do not fear death so much but rather the inadequate life."

~ Bertolt Brecht~

Have You Met My Twin?

So.... i'm finally back to my personal blog space... To be honest... i was not as busy as you thought i was... since i've not updated this space for sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo longgggggggggggggggg!!!

Yes.. i've been busy... cos it's summer.. and i've been busy going out... kekekeke.. AND... yesh.. i have been a traitor to this web space cos i have been dedicating my time to write for the other 'work' blog space instead... more news on that in a later post.. but if you are curious.. please do check out my other new blog that is made for the city website... i was asked if i can write about my life and experiences living in Sapporo and i said YES!! right now.. my other 'work' blog is linked to the city website... Wooooooo... Some real awesome shit ain't it?!! 

Okay.. the new blog is www.sapporoaccordingtopinkpheng.blogspot.com and it is listed and linked on www.sapporo-now.com/en/

PLEASE SUPPORT!!

Okay.. back to my twin... now.. i'm sorry she has been hiding behind close curtains and doors for so long.. she's a bit shy... and yes.. we do usually pull the switcheroo at times.. whenever i'm too tired to attend classes or feeling a tad anti-social.. my twin will go in my place and vice versa...

Okay.. that was an outrageous lie i made up in less than 2 minutes... i was so bored that i rather make up stories about my twin cos it sounded more interesting as compared to saying that i got bored at 4.57am in the wee morning and decided to create my own twin so i can have someone to get bored with... wtf...

Anyway.. I have yet to give my 'twin' a name... so help me there if you have any brilliant suggestion.. Tah came up with Regina Phalange cos i told him that my twin is my alter ego.. and the name Regina Phalange was the first name that popped onto his head cos she's Phoebe's (from the series Friends) alter ego name... 

Other more popular alter ego names include Beyonce's Sasha Fierce.. but i dun want it that way... i dun see my twin being someone like that... so macam mana?!!

Cracking my head naming my twin... so i went online and tried out some 'alter ego name generator'... LOL... Seriously!! there are such websites out there.... Hahahahaha... random stuff one can find online.. *shakes head*

So... the first web application called Quizfarm said my alter ego name was 'Brooke'... i tot it was a bit meh cos there's no last name to it and the name Brooke is so normal and common that it doesn't sound bit alter-egoish at all... 

So... i tot i'll try another site then.. and click the second link on the google search result.. that led me to Quizopolis

This time.. i have gotten myself an even funkier alter ego name.. (dun mind the redundancy made earlier.. it was on purpose... BoO!)

Quizopolis decided to alter-ego named me 'Junk in the Trunk Janiqua'..... MUAHAHAHHAHHAHAHA.......... LMFAO!!!! 

Anyway... so i tot the first name Brooke was too plain and bland for an alter ego name.. and 'Junk in the Trunk Janiqua' was just too much... hahahaha.. still can't stop laughing at this.... BUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How about Brooke Janiqua??!! Sounds good? No? I dunno? I absolutely love it!!!! it has a very nice ring to it... hehehehe... But to be honest... i am still stepping a brake on this one as much as i love it.. cos i am still contemplating using this name..  i love both the names joined together.... but i wasn't too happy with the abbreviation though... i mean.. ermmm... BJ?! *cough cough* so macam mana??!!

Anyway.. here are some pics of me and my twin.... sigh... i love her max.... (:

I can 'manja' with my twin... *sigh*

An obvious love relation with my twin.. *hearts*

Can get bored together-gether... dun need to be #foreveralone

All smiles about common stuff we both find amusing (:

Throwing back our heads and just laugh for great fun

See how lovely and fun it is for me to have my own twin cum alter ego.... I foresee many fun and playful moments we're gonna be sharing together.... kekeke..

Hope i'll decide a name for her soon enough.... i dun like her being Jane Doe right now.. BoO!!

It's double the giggles and double the grins, and double the trouble if you're blessed with twins.  
~Author Unknown~

Joyeux Anniversaire

Happy 29th Birthday to moi~~

26.08.2011 Dal Segno, Sapporo, Hokkaido, Japan

"I have an Angel on my shoulder but a Devil in my head"

~ lyrics by Kaskade

Eat, Learn and Move

I chanced upon these videos from lookbook.nu a couple of days back.. and i have to say.. i was so impressed by it that even i was at the nick 'minute' in running VERY late for my appointment... i was still trying to 'reshare' it on my facebook page.. hahaha.. that was how good these videos made me feel...

I guess every one of us has a part in us that we just want to do what these guys did...

Travel the world, Learn new stuff and Enjoy different kind of food offered by the big oyster world out there..

i know i did and still do...

hence, with my new life in Japan.. this has definitely some how made this part of me comes true... I was blessed with great opportunities to travel even before i moved my life to Japan.. thanks a lot to great work opportunities that came my way.. let's see... my first oversee trip was to Greece... then followed by Thailand, Indonesia, Philippines, Singapore, Switzerland, UK, Hong Kong, Japan, Spain, France, Belgium, Netherlands, Czech Republic, Italy and I am sure there's more traveling to come since I've made my "Project Before40"... hehehe.. click HERE if you have not read it yet!

I'll just go straight to these amazing videos and you will know wat i mean...

EAT

EAT from Rick Mereki on Vimeo.

LEARN

LEARN from Rick Mereki on Vimeo.

MOVE

MOVE from Rick Mereki on Vimeo.

Actually, my favorite video of all 3 is the last one.. MOVE... but i do have to say.. Learn is one of the one that inspires me most...

But nonetheless.. I want to live my life as how these 3 guys simply puts it in all 3 videos.. "Eat, Learn and Move".. Good stuff!!

"In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away" 

~sing xhiong~

Late Night Alumni- This is Why (I don't cry)

i stopped short the other day of doing nothing... yes.. the irony of the first statement i made... but tht's just me.... please dun be bothered by my randomness... i was fiddling with some moosic online and browsing new CDs to buy... at late, i think i'm spending way too much on moosic that i can declare myself going broke supporting the music industry... lol.. i don't think i can ever live without moosic.. it's like blood running in my veins... to keep me alive n breathing in every single day.. to just survive... moosic is definitely what allows me to see things at a different angle.. where dreams are the reality and reality does not exist... at least the ugly part of life.. hehe (:

My song of the month of August.. moi's favorite month cos it's my 'naked day'... hehe... i think this song represents my journey of embracing life beautifully... i definitely want this song to be commemorated..

This is from my favorite music band ever... Late Night Alumni.. and thank you guys for keeping me alive through your moosic... hearts and peace out..

Lyrics that says it all:

Ever since I remember
I’ve held it in
Held it all

Somehow I felt comfortable
Behind my wall
Behind it all

This is why I don’t cry
This is why I don’t cry

Tears they only compromise
Things I need to visualize

This is why I don’t cry
This is why I don’t cry

Tears they only minimize
Everything I keep inside

I bet you think I’m lonely
You may be right
I just might

And if you want me to break down
It would be a sight
But not tonight

This is why I don’t cry
This is why I don’t cry

Tears they only compromise
Things I need to visualize

This is why I don’t cry
This is why I don’t cry

Tears they only minimize
Everything I keep inside

"Without music, life would be a mistake." 

~Friedrich Nietzsche~

Random Junk I Bought- Diet Pants/ Spanx

Yup.. u read it right... this is a super random post cos i am bored to my wits and i cannot bring myself to write anything interesting... and this pants has been sitting on my study table for the past few days cos i dun want to wear them without writing about them yet.. so NAH!! here is the write up on this super random product...

was just roaming around Donkey Hotte ドンキホテ at Tanokikoji the other day.. and was randomly picking up 'rubbish' that caught my interest when i saw this hanging on the rack where i was checking out some cute socks... without hesitation.. grab it off the shelf and place them into the basket.... YES.. it's so obvious my point of purchase was triggered by the word 'Diet' written so largely on the top.. lol.. i like to amuse myself sometimes..

the so called diet pants that caught my eyes.. 

I've yet to try them on yet but i doubt it is gonna do wonders to my ass.. but let's just see... i just like the idea of trying out all the farnie farnie stuff u can find in Japan..

Anyway, the label said it can locks in moisture as well as keeps it odor free.. i am not sure how that's gonna happen.. but the texture of the clothes is very comfortable from what i feel of it.. in fact, it looks and feels more expensive than what i have to pay for.. 

Yes... unfortunately, i fall under size L... sigh.. maybe this pants will bring me to size M *hopeful*

Well... will try it on soon enough and write what i think of it after this... anyway.. if it doesn't work well.. i gained myself a very cheap and comfortable pair of inner tights to wear under dresses and short skirts.. that way works fine by me as well.. hahaha.... smart not? *tap index finger onto right temple*

UPdate: My gf just confirmed to me that Spanx doesn't makes u lose weight.. it just help shape ur body to appear slightly smaller than it originally is... so there u have it,.. this spanx will just become my inner tights from now as well as a tool to con innocent men out there to think i have got a smaller ass.. WTF!!

"Hope is a very thin diet"

~Thomas Shadwell~

Straight But Not Narrow (SBNN)

I came across this video some time back and upon watching it, i started following them on Twitter @WeAreSBNN

It touched me for awhile there and after that, i sort of let it slipped away from my mind after being ambushed by so many other stuff in my head and life.. Just so happen once again, i was watching the same video again and thought to myself that if i really to support of this cause.. i should act on it.. i may not be holding placards shouting in the street of Sapporo.. I may not be signing petition or lobbying for new constitution towards gay rights in front of the parliament.. BUT I am definitely playing my role here in my personal blog to share this great message to you all out there.. if you LIKE it as much as I do, help spread the message across... i believe no matter how small an effort each one of us took.. we will definitely make a change...here, i want to highlight this great campaign and cause that i find very meaningful and should be shared to others.. 

The man behind this great idea is Avan Jogia who wishes for straight young men to help voice out their support and present a non discriminative act towards men who like men... I am just gonna go straight to the point and share you their PSA video that can be found on their website www.WeAreSBNN.com 

My favorite of all is Cory Monteith... not sure it's his natural way of talking to the camera than does it or the wonderful soundtrack in the background... but either ways.. this video just so works it for me!! Great job!!

P/S: I may be just a girl and might not be the right target audience of this project.. but i do hope i can help make a change as well... (:

"I started being really proud of the fact that I was gay even though I wasn't."

Kurt Cobain